Comments on: Ask Lynn on Yahoo: Why hasn’t he called? http://www.breakupgirl.net/?p=4897 "Saving Love Lives The World Over!" Thu, 23 May 2013 02:51:57 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.7 hourly 1 By: karen http://www.breakupgirl.net/?p=4897&cpage=1#comment-57858 karen Mon, 18 Oct 2010 16:29:55 +0000 http://www.breakupgirl.net/?p=4897#comment-57858 don't put all your eggs in one basket, if he's not feeling it, he's not feeling it. plain and simple. :P NEXT! don’t put all your eggs in one basket, if he’s not feeling it, he’s not feeling it. plain and simple. :P NEXT!

]]> By: Karl R http://www.breakupgirl.net/?p=4897&cpage=1#comment-57847 Karl R Mon, 18 Oct 2010 15:19:48 +0000 http://www.breakupgirl.net/?p=4897#comment-57847 When it comes to romance, men tend to live in the moment. On a first date, I was always focused on having a good (fun, enjoyable) first date. Later, when I was alone, I would mentally review the date and make any future plans. The only exception were the times when I quickly decided that I *didn't* want a second date. But in those cases, I wasn't interested in being affectionate either. After three days with no reply, assume the answer is "No thanks," and move on. I agree that you want to avoid building any kind of fantasy about what might happen in a relationship. When I'm on a first date, I'm completely relaxed. I'm doing my best to enjoy myself. What happens if she decides that she doesn't like me? Nothing. It's easy to relax when there's nothing at stake. What happens if you build a fantasy? Suddenly you have something to lose. What happens if the man decides he doesn't like you? That dream is destroyed. It's harder to relax on the date when you have something to lose. The more time and emotion that you've invested into the fantasy, the harder it is to relax. Unless you're at your best when you're anxious and nervous, you want to avoid fantasizing. When it comes to romance, men tend to live in the moment. On a first date, I was always focused on having a good (fun, enjoyable) first date. Later, when I was alone, I would mentally review the date and make any future plans.

The only exception were the times when I quickly decided that I *didn’t* want a second date. But in those cases, I wasn’t interested in being affectionate either.

After three days with no reply, assume the answer is “No thanks,” and move on.

I agree that you want to avoid building any kind of fantasy about what might happen in a relationship. When I’m on a first date, I’m completely relaxed. I’m doing my best to enjoy myself. What happens if she decides that she doesn’t like me? Nothing. It’s easy to relax when there’s nothing at stake.

What happens if you build a fantasy? Suddenly you have something to lose. What happens if the man decides he doesn’t like you? That dream is destroyed. It’s harder to relax on the date when you have something to lose. The more time and emotion that you’ve invested into the fantasy, the harder it is to relax.

Unless you’re at your best when you’re anxious and nervous, you want to avoid fantasizing.

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