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May 20, 2008

Looking for love in all the same places

Filed under: Psychology,TV — posted by Maria @ 4:14 pm

For those of you in a re-relationship like mine, it turns out we are not the freaks our friends try to make us out to be. In fact there’s an entire subset of relationships — with their own TV role models, of course — that have risen from the very ashes of their own breakups. (Again, and again, and again.)

According to a recent article in the Contra Costa Times, the cycle of breaking up and making up with the same person — you know, in the inimitable words of Charlene: “That man you fought with this morning, the same one you’re going to make love to tonight” — has a lot to do with our biological makeup, our fears of being alone, and, in some “extreme” cases, an addiction to the “I love, I mean hate, I mean LOVE you” drama.

Lisa Gray, a marriage and family therapist, says: “[These couples] get addicted to that up and down of emotion. The more quiet, stable love is not really cultivated as something to be respected. Just watch the common TV shows. These loud breakups-and-get-back-togethers are what get the attention.”

If that’s the case, I, for one, would be perfectly happy to spend the rest of my life never getting any attention ever again. Quiet, stable love, where are you?

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