e-mail to a friend in needClosing the lines of communication
A game of telephone on March 16, 1998…
Dear Breakup Girl,
About a year ago, an old male friend moved back to town. We quickly became best friends. Our feelings toward each other changed and we began dating, then he lost his job. The dating stopped. We remained close friends until we got in a fight about us dating, and haven’t spoken in four months. Now, his brother is calling me, wanting to know details about my personal life. I think my friend is up to it, but feel that he should be the one calling me. My best friend disagrees and says that I should tell his brother how I feel. What do you think?
– Joanna
Dear Joanna,
Tell the brother nothing. Except maybe if you want to just happen to let it slip that you are currently succesful and satisfied in all areas of your life. And also that you got that way as a result of having unlocked the secret to the universe, which is: mind and conduct your own business.
Love,
Breakup Girl
Fantastic advice as always. Unless Joanna and the “old friend” are under 21, the “old friend” needs to man up and ask for himself. Part of being a man, and a good partner, is being able to a) take responsibility, b) admit when you’re wrong or c) stand up for yourself (properly) when you’re being wronged.
If he wants to show that he wants you back, he should move heaven and earth to get you back. And end around is a great play in football, it’s a HORRIBLE “play” in love.
Oh, and one less “conventional” comment. Joanna: don’t get tied up in gender roles. If for some reason you really want him back — why wait? Call him. But just be sure that you know what you’re getting into and why you’re looking to get him back. (Just being single isn’t a good enough reason)
Thanks for the post — and best wishes to Joanna in her search for true love.
Comment by Ross Felix — March 12, 2010 @ 11:14 am
he sounds like a coward, instead of asking how she is directly, he is having his BROTHER do it? can we say chicken? I would send him a cadburry egg saying “egg on your face”.
Either that or say “that is none of your business”
Comment by Karen — March 12, 2010 @ 2:21 pm