Big To Do
About Us

“Saving Love Lives The World Over!” e-mail e-mail to a friend in need

April 23, 2010

Flickering Flame

Filed under: Advice — posted by Breakup Girl @ 8:01 am

Weighing the options on March 23, 1998

Dear Breakup Girl,

Frankly, I am losing interest in my husband; he is not the man I married. We have known each other for a number of years and have been married for about two. The passion is gone. We rarely see each other because of his job and mine (about 12 hours a week if we are lucky). We have had numerous discussions and he leads me to believe he is no longer attracted to me because I have have gained weight (30 lbs.) since we married. The reasons for my weight gain are numerous: #1 would be the period of unemployment prior to my current job and the fact that there is absolutely nothing in the town we live in and I have no friends here. My true concern is how do I keep the flame alive? I have tried seduction, homemade meals, talking, time alone — frankly I am fresh out of ideas.

— Q

Dear Q,

Hard to say whether the weight gain is the problem — sad and shallow fact is, ever since the waning of the Rubenesque glory days, men and women have been conditioned to not be attracted to plumpitude — or the scapegoat. I’d like to think, anyway, that your marriage / passion was based on more than your figure. Or maybe it wasn’t, which is why it’s shaky now. In any case, clarify what you really want. You say you’re losing interest in this guy who isn’t the man you married, but also that you want to keep the flame alive. Is “the flame” really code for “your pride” — do you actually want to prove, in light of what he implied, that you’re still attractive? If that’s the case, then no amount of homemade meals or Saran Wrap (around you, not the homemade leftovers) is going to work some kind of overnight magic. In any case, you don’t need to lose weight; you need to gain — as you seem to understand — friends, quality time, a social life, maybe even a marriage counselor. Easier said than gained, I know; start with the counselor. Also take some solace in the next letter.

Breakup Girl


  1. Quality articles is the crucial to attract the users to go to see the
    web site, that’s what this website is providing.

    Comment by Dieter — July 21, 2017 @ 5:14 am

  2. Greetings! Very useful advice within this article!
    It’s the little changes that produce the greatest changes.
    Many thanks for sharing!

    Comment by adventure travel — July 21, 2017 @ 4:28 pm

  3. constantly i used to read smaller articles or reviews that as well clear
    their motive, and that is also happening with this piece of writing which I am
    reading here.

    Comment by Lelio Vieira Carneiro — July 21, 2017 @ 9:32 pm

  4. I know this site gives quality based articles or reviews and extra stuff, is there any other web page which provides such information in quality?

    Comment by www.hackerslab.or.kr — July 22, 2017 @ 3:34 pm

  5. Oh my goodness! Amazing article dude! Many thanks, However
    I am going through problems with your RSS. I don’t
    know the reason why I am unable to join it.
    Is there anybody having the same RSS issues? Anybody who knows the answer
    will you kindly respond? Thanx!!

    Comment by Jasmin — July 22, 2017 @ 11:25 pm

  6. Your style is so unique compared to other people I have read stuff from.

    I appreciate you for posting when you’ve got the opportunity, Guess I will just book mark this
    web site.

    Comment by https://www.facebook.com/maurozamprogno — July 23, 2017 @ 3:58 am

  7. Very quickly this website will be famous among all blogging and site-building viewers, due to it’s nice articles or reviews

    Comment by Glam Seamless Reviews — July 23, 2017 @ 9:12 am

  8. Heya i am for the first time here. I found this board and I find It truly useful & it helped me out a lot.
    I hope to give something back and aid others like you aided me.

    Comment by Luiz Gastão Bittencourt da Silva — July 24, 2017 @ 1:57 am

  9. Hello to every , for the reason that I am genuinely eager
    of reading this web site’s post to be updated on a regular basis.
    It consists of pleasant stuff.

    Comment by Georges Sadala Rihan — July 24, 2017 @ 10:31 pm

  10. Great site you have got here.. It’s hard to find high quality writing like yours nowadays.

    I really appreciate people like you! Take care!!

    Comment by http://qz334.cn/home.php?mod=space&uid=114120&do=profile&from=space — July 25, 2017 @ 10:07 am

  11. I enjoy what you guys are up too. This sort of
    clever work and reporting! Keep up the terrific works guys I’ve incorporated you
    guys to my blogroll.

    Comment by Merissa — July 25, 2017 @ 4:49 pm

  12. Does your site have a contact page? I’m having problems locating it
    but, I’d like to send you an e-mail. I’ve got some suggestions for your blog
    you might be interested in hearing. Either way, great blog and I look forward to seeing it expand over time.

    Comment by Georges Sadala — July 25, 2017 @ 10:24 pm

  13. It’s difficult to find experienced people for this subject, however,
    you sound like you know what you’re talking about! Thanks

    Comment by ade-esports.es — July 26, 2017 @ 2:05 am

  14. Hi, Neat post. There is an issue with your site in web explorer,
    would test this? IE nonetheless is the marketplace leader and a good component to other people will omit your fantastic writing because of this problem.

    Comment by Lelio Vieira Carneiro Junior — July 26, 2017 @ 7:13 pm

  15. I will immediately snatch your rss as I can’t find your email subscription hyperlink
    or e-newsletter service. Do you’ve any? Please permit me realize in order that I may subscribe.

    Comment by email marketing program — July 28, 2017 @ 5:48 pm

  16. Do you have a spam issue on this website; I also am a
    blogger, and I was curious about your situation; many of us have developed some nice methods and we are
    looking to swap methods with other folks, why not shoot me an e-mail if interested.

    Comment by Mamie — July 28, 2017 @ 9:40 pm

  17. I got this web site from my friend who told me concerning this website and now this time
    I am visiting this site and reading very informative posts at this place.

    Comment by Brendan — August 2, 2017 @ 12:22 pm

  18. It’s perfect time to make some plans for the future and it’s time
    to be happy. I’ve read this post and if I could I wish to suggest you some interesting things or suggestions.

    Maybe you can write next articles referring to this article.
    I desire to read even more things about it!

    Comment by Lelio Vieira Carneiro Junior — August 4, 2017 @ 1:33 pm

  19. I simply couldn’t depart your website prior to suggesting
    that I actually enjoyed the standard info a person provide on your guests?
    Is gonna be back frequently in order to check up on new posts

    Comment by George — August 4, 2017 @ 3:18 pm

  20. These are actually great ideas in concerning blogging. You have touched some good things
    here. Any way keep up wrinting.

    Comment by business cards happens — August 4, 2017 @ 4:52 pm

  21. Just desire to say your article is as surprising.

    The clarity in your post is just spectacular and i can assume you’re an expert
    on this subject. Well with your permission allow me to grab your feed to keep updated with forthcoming post.
    Thanks a million and please keep up the gratifying work.

    Comment by William — August 5, 2017 @ 11:32 pm

  22. Hi there, I log on to your blogs regularly. Your story-telling style is
    awesome, keep doing what you’re doing!

    Comment by www.euroma.gr — August 6, 2017 @ 6:05 pm

  23. Today, I went to the beach with my children. I found
    a sea shell and gave it to my 4 year old daughter and said
    “You can hear the ocean if you put this to your ear.” She put the
    shell to her ear and screamed. There was a hermit crab inside and it pinched her ear.
    She never wants to go back! LoL I know this is entirely off topic but I had to tell someone!

    Comment by business managers — August 6, 2017 @ 9:53 pm

  24. What’s Happening i’m new to this, I stumbled upon this I’ve discovered It absolutely useful and it has aided me
    out loads. I am hoping to give a contribution & help other users like its helped me.
    Great job.

    Comment by apple iphone four — August 7, 2017 @ 12:05 am

  25. Hey, I think your website might be having browser compatibility issues.
    When I look at your blog in Ie, it looks fine but when opening in Internet Explorer, it has some overlapping.

    I just wanted to give you a quick heads up! Other then that, amazing blog!

    Comment by Lelio Vieira Carneiro — August 10, 2017 @ 12:49 am

  26. Inspiring quest there. What occurred after? Good

    Comment by https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Luiz_Gasto_Bittencourt_da_Silva.jpg — August 17, 2017 @ 4:50 pm

  27. Hello! This is kind of off topic but I need some help from an established blog.
    Is it tough to set up your own blog? I’m not very techincal but I can figure things out pretty fast.
    I’m thinking about making my own but I’m not sure
    where to start. Do you have any ideas or suggestions?

    Comment by http://www.tamtrilam.com — August 21, 2017 @ 12:42 pm

  28. Awesome things here. I am very satisfied to see your article.
    Thanks a lot and I am looking ahead to touch you.
    Will you please drop me a mail?

    Comment by augusto de arruda botelho — August 23, 2017 @ 3:31 pm

  29. Greetings! Very helpful advice in this particular post!
    It’s the little changes that produce the greatest
    changes. Thanks a lot for sharing!

    Comment by augusto de arruda botelho — August 24, 2017 @ 9:45 am

  30. Oh my goodness! Awesome article dude! Many thanks, However
    I am experiencing troubles with your RSS. I don’t
    understand why I can’t subscribe to it. Is there anyone
    else getting identical RSS issues? Anyone who knows the solution will
    you kindly respond? Thanks!!

    Comment by Vanessa — August 24, 2017 @ 8:50 pm

  31. I believe what you published was very logical.
    But, think about this, suppose you composed a catchier title?
    I am not saying your information is not solid, but suppose you
    added a title that makes people want more? I mean Breakup Girl » Flickering Flame is a little vanilla.
    You ought to peek at Yahoo’s home page and watch how
    they write news titles to grab people to open the links.
    You might add a related video or a picture or two to grab readers interested about what you’ve written. In my opinion, it
    might bring your blog a little bit more interesting.

    Comment by Silvia Odete Morani Massad — August 25, 2017 @ 12:12 am

  32. Hi there to all, it’s truly a good for me to pay a quick visit this website, it consists of priceless Information.

    Comment by Umanizzare presidios — September 2, 2017 @ 3:56 pm

  33. Hi there, just wanted to tell you, I loved this blog post.
    It was inspiring. Keep on posting!

    Comment by Tammie — September 8, 2017 @ 7:17 pm

  34. I’ve been browsing online more than three hours today, yet I never
    found any interesting article like yours. It is pretty worth enough
    for me. Personally, if all website owners and bloggers
    made good content as you did, the web will be a lot more useful than ever

    Comment by best tips travelling — September 17, 2017 @ 8:03 pm

  35. Nice response in return of this matter with firm arguments
    and describing everything about that.

    Comment by solidniy-podarok.ru — September 22, 2017 @ 9:12 pm

  36. Oh my goodness! Amazing article dude! Many thanks, However I am having difficulties with your RSS.
    I don’t understand why I cannot subscribe to it. Is there anybody
    else getting identical RSS issues? Anybody who knows the answer can you kindly
    respond? Thanx!!

    Comment by timex watches make — September 30, 2017 @ 7:29 am

  37. You really make it seem so easy with your presentation but
    I find this topic to be really something which I think I would never understand.
    It seems too complex and very broad for me. I am looking forward for
    your next post, I’ll try to get the hang of it!

    Comment by buy arsenal soccer — September 30, 2017 @ 10:28 pm

  38. Thanks , I have recently been looking for info approximately
    this topic for ages and yours is the greatest I have
    came upon so far. But, what in regards to the conclusion? Are you positive concerning the source?

    Comment by yeswedding.uol.com.br — October 1, 2017 @ 7:23 pm

  39. There is definately a lot to know about this subject.
    I really like all of the points you made.

    Comment by Itamar Serp — October 19, 2017 @ 2:51 am

  40. Does your website have a contact page? I’m having a tough time locating it but, I’d like to shoot you an e-mail.
    I’ve got some recommendations for your blog you might be
    interested in hearing. Either way, great site and I look forward to seeing it expand over time.

    Comment by asbestos removal company — November 5, 2017 @ 6:34 pm

  41. I like what you guys are usually up too. This kind of clever work and
    exposure! Keep up the amazing works guys I’ve included you guys to my personal blogroll.

    Comment by timex observe — November 7, 2017 @ 10:54 pm

  42. Thanks for sharing your thoughts on hello. Regards

    Comment by Luiz Gastao Bittencourt da Silva — November 12, 2017 @ 4:24 pm

  43. I enjoy reading through an article that can make men and women think.
    Also, thanks for allowing me to comment!

    Comment by http://forum.cashtactics.net — November 18, 2017 @ 4:40 pm

  44. Cleans and prepares ground for prime polish.

    Comment by floor polishing services malaysia — April 2, 2018 @ 4:13 pm

  45. Good Luck and Glad Stair Constructing.

    Comment by stair builders colorado springs — April 3, 2018 @ 9:16 pm

  46. Many damp basements are brought on by these minor

    Comment by waterproofing basement cost nj — April 11, 2018 @ 12:41 am

RSS feed for comments on this post. TrackBack URL

Leave a comment

**Mean or otherwise out-of-line comments will be deleted. That’s just how we roll.


blog | advice | comics | animation | goodies | to do | archive | about us

Breakup Girl created by Lynn Harris & Chris Kalb
© 2008 Just Friends Productions, Inc.
| privacy policy
Cool Aid!

Important Breakup Girl Maxim:
Breakup Girl Sez


Powered by WordPress