There she goes, on January 5, 1998…
Dear Breakup Girl,
About eight months ago my girlfriend of three years and I decided that our relationship was on a one-way trip to nowheresville. She moved out and we decided that we could “just be friends.” Well, we couldn’t! Big surprise. So now we no longer talk.
About six months after the breakup I noticed this girl that I wanted to get to know. However, I did not want to start up a relationship until I had purged all my feelings for my ex-girlfriend and felt comfortable with myself again. Well, I finally felt ready to move on (which is not an easy thing to accomplish) and decided to talk to the new girl. I found out that she is really cool and that I wanted to pursue a relationship with her. I also sensed that she felt the same about me. Here is the big problem: she is moving to Florida for two years to finish school.
We said our goodbyes at a Christmas party and I’ve been wallowing in a quagmire of depression almost as bad as my initial breakup last April. I know that not much can develop from a relationship that spans 1500 miles, but I really enjoyed talking to her and would like to get to know her a little better. But I would get to see her only about every four or five months. A friendship is always an option; however, I don’t want to end up getting hurt. Should I try to keep up correspondence with this new girl via letters, e-mail, long distance phone calls, etc.? Or should I just accept the fact that fate has dealt me a card from the bottom of the deck and move on?
— Cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs
Here’s the thing about Miss Florida. I’m sure she’s lovely, but I’m also sure that she has taken on a slightly inflated significance in your life. One of the conclusions people tend to draw after a breakup is that they will never love or be loved again. Especially after an arduous moving-on process, your Miami Vice was the first indication you’d gotten to the contrary. So if you want to e-mail now and then, don’t let me stop you. But don’t put all of your oranges in that basket.