e-mail to a friend in needTwo guys, a girl and a fabulous resort
Getting messy on November 30, 1998…
Dear Breakup Girl,
I dated a guy for a year. It began as an almost exaggeratedly casual “dating” situation, both of us trying to be too cool for words, but dammit, we got along REALLY well. So, stuff happened-couple stuff like going on vacation together, and talking twice a day (we are on opposite coasts), and showing up together at functions and what have you. This guy is cute and sexy and smart and a wee bit spoiled, and my read on him was always that he was very attached to me and maybe even a bit in love, but that he wasn’t gonna fess that up to ME anytime soon. And frankly, I’m pretty much the same way, a self-protective goon. So after about eight months of this deepening but unaddressed relationship (led on by him , thankyouverymuch), I find out he’s had a one-nighter with some Norwegian au pair. I inform him that I know very well that we don’t have a formalized commitment, so he was well within his rights to do that, but I don’t like it, and so sayonara. Well, natch, he freaks, informs me he’s crazy about me, says it’s the only time it happened (substantiated by my independent counsel investigation of various mutual friends), says he wants a commitment, and we are off to the races. It gets a tad more serious (i.e. I meet the family) and then two months later he drops the bomb. His ex (six year relationship, he failed to pull the trigger, she bailed and married someone else and now there are photos of her in all drawers of his house) is coming unglued from her marriage and has been calling a lot and he’s “confused” and doesn’t want to break up but wants to be “truthful” about his “mixed emotions” and intends to go hang out with the ex. So being a strong 90s girl I dump him and tell him to call me when he gets his sh*t together. It hurts like hell.
Six days later I meet the sweetest guy on the planet. This guy cooks dinner for me, gives foot massages and washes my car when I go out of town. I cannot imagine this guy playing head games or being deceitful. He’s brilliant and the sex is amazing and I start to learn all kinds of nifty stuff I can expect in a relationship, like respect, communication, expression of tender feelings.
Three weeks later my ex shows up to tell me that it’s me he wants and the whole issue was less his ex than his fear (duh) and can we please try again. I list the eighteen things I want changed and he agrees with me and says okay.
Now, I can’t see shutting the door on a year of #1 because I’ve had three awesome weeks with #2, who is fab but IS a Republican and a Baptist, and a hunter, for God’s sake. So I am going away with my ex to see if he can behave and if we can get to somewhere good together. Naturally the new guy is hurt and angry and even though I’ve pointed out to him that without closure on #1 I’m not going much of anywhere in any relationship, he basically has told me to F-off and give him a call later. This has the eerie ring of something I said to #1, so I understand although after three weeks it’s a pretty hardline stance to take. The problem is: I’m about to take off to a fabulous resort with my ex and I can’t seem to even get happy about it. I don’t feel good. I miss the other guy. I have tons of leftover anger for my ex and I know that on paper guy #2 seems like a paragon, and I basically feel like whichever way I turn I am screwing something up. I want to see how I really feel about #1– I need to– but losing #2 is breaking my heart. I know about having your cake and eating it too, but how do I get my feelings straight?
– Julee
Dear Julee,
Believe it or not, for what it’s worth, you all seem to me to be dealing with the natural messiness of love in all its multiple dimensions — like time (the past) and space (distance) — with a great deal of smarts and strength. The mini-breaks have been clean, straightforward, and well-advised; everyone’s being pretty damn honest and self-aware. And it makes sense that you have mixed, confused feelings. Guys #1 and #2 each sound pretty great, they each sound pretty different, and you can’t, ultimately, have both.
All you need, I think, is a dose of perspective about guy #2. In order to give it to you, I need to use a word that may strike more fear into your heart than “Republican,” “Baptist,” and “hunter” combined. Ready? Rebound. Now, I’m not saying that just because he showed up during the Rebound Time Zone (six days later) he can’t be a real boyfriend in camouflage. But things seem to have moved awfully fast in three weeks. Which could be because you’re true soulmates or some such, or it could be because he was in the right place — massaging the right feet — at the right time.
So if I were you, I’d go ahead and give the, uh, Democrat a chance. You have more invested there. See how he does with the eighteen (!) things (at least maybe the twelve most importantest ones, Miss Julee). Not just on one getaway … over time. Which brings up the nineteenth thing — or maybe the first — when are you going to live on the same coast?
Love,
Breakup Girl
i am giving this testimony cos l am happy
My name is mrs. Deborah Collins from Houston,taxes.i never believed in love spells or magic until i met this spell caster once. when i went to Africa in December this year on a business summit. i ment a man called dr. Atakpo.He is powerful he could help you cast a spells to bring back my love’s gone,misbehaving lover looking for some one to love you, bring back lost money and magic money spell or spell for a good job.i’m now happy & a living testimony cos the man i had wanted to marry left me 3 weeks before our wedding and my life was upside down cos our relationship has been on for 2 years… i really loved him, but his mother was against me and he had no good paying job. so when i met this spell caster, i told him what happened and explained the situation of things to him..at first i was undecided,skeptical and doubtful, but i just gave it a try. and in 6 days when i returned to taxes, my boyfriend (is now my husband ) he called me by himself and came to me apologizing that everything had been settled with his mom and family and he got a new job interview so we should get married..i didn’t believe it cos the spell caster only asked for my name and my boyfriends name and all i wanted him to do… well we are happily married now and we are expecting our little kid,and my husband also got a new job and our lives became much better. in case anyone needs the spell caster for some help, email address atakpospelltemple@yahoo.com
Great Atakpo i thank you very much thank you in 1000000 times.. if not you i would have been losted and wasted thank you.
please make sure you contact him for any financial difficulties okay..
What a powerful man such as Dr Atakpo.. he is so much powerful..\\ email him for any difficulties.. atakpospelltemple@yahoo.com
Comment by deborah — January 29, 2013 @ 6:59 pm
how i got my cheatin husband back
My name is MR JULITE wood I married with two wonderful kid and I am a Canadian.My husband and i have been married for 10years and we were such a big happy family.But he started changing ” for the worse ” he looked at me like a stranger and he treat the kid like they weren’t even his.I knew at ones that he had another woman.I hired a private investigator that cost me a lot.It turned out that i was right all along.I couldn’t just believe it so I confronted him with the pictures I had but he denied it bluntly.He said she just just a girl he has some working project with and foolish of me i so believed him.But on bad day i caught them red handed at that moment my heart stopped for a while as i bust into tears.I was furious that i hit the whore so hard before I could ask why with my shaking voice my husband
hit me so hard.I have never seen in his eyes so much hate before.I fell to ground crying my heart out it was so hurtful.He was no longer living with me and our kids I still remember his words ” keep the house and your sick kids “.I wanted to drop dead but my lovely kids gave me strength to fight for what was my.He was asking for a divorce but i wanted to my husband back so i had to delay the process to buy time for myself so as to figure out a way to get him back.On a good day “god bless the internet “i stumbled on an ad of how a girl got her boyfriend back after he broke up with because of some girl with the help of a witch doctor or a spell caster at first I told myself it’s scam but as pressure from my husband lawyer increased I became desperate and gave it try .I contacted him with his email address she left in her ad.His mail were so had to his English was not so clear but he helped me any way off course not for free he charged me and i pay every cent. thank the stars it work.I paid for the material which he used for the rite And when he claimed to have finished whatever he was doing i paid for his services.He sent me a hand written enchanting words and asked me to recite morning and night for seven day ” as he said seven is the perfect number “I did just that but at first nothing happened out of frustration i sent all kind of insult to him even calling a low life scam.He said he could destroy the entire thing he did but he wouldn’t so I can see how wrong i was.he said those enchanting words he gave me will make my husband see the demon in his new lover and its going to make him hurt badly.just a
week later my husband was sued for physical abuse on his so called New girlfriend.he gave a black eye and didn’t show remorse in the court house.just what the spell-caster had said ” he would hurt her badly “.he literally confessed that he hated her all of a sudden.All the witch dr peter did worked.Thank the stars she only wanted him to stay away from her so the judge asked him to pay $5000.after all this is trouble my husband came back asking for my forgiveness and I did without thinking it was all I wanted for him to come back to me and the kid.My husband and i have never since this kind of happiness before.He his as faithful to me and as a saint.I know cos I hear his friends say “what happened to the fun guy we know “.so if you have a similar problem just contact ayokospellcaster@gmail.com i bet you this one is know fake.You can only choose to believe me cos i haven’t tried this spell thing before and now that I have i can only happily share with who ever is reading this.
Comment by JULIET — April 29, 2013 @ 5:02 am
My Name is James WESTLEY..I never believed in Love Spells or Magics until I met this special spell caster when i contact this man called ayokospellcaster@gmail.com Execute some business..He is really powerful..My wife divorce me with no reason for almost 4 years and i tried all i could to have her back cos i really love her so much but all my effort did not work out.. we met at our early age at the college and we both have feelings for each other and we got married happily for 5 years with no kid and she woke up one morning and she told me she’s going on a divorce..i thought it was a joke and when she came back from work she tender to me a divorce letter and she packed all her loads from my house..i ran mad and i tried all i could to have her back but all did not work out..i was lonely for almost 4 years…So when i told the spell caster what happened he said he will help me and he asked for her full name and her picture..i gave him that..At first i was skeptical but i gave it a try cos have tried so many spell casters and there is no solution…so when he finished with the readings,he got back to me that she’s with a man and that man is the reason why she left me…The spell caster said he will help me with a spell that will surely bring her back.but i never believe all this…he told me i will see a positive result within 3 days..3 days later,she called me herself and came to me apologizingI NEVER BELIEVED IN LOVE SPELLS UNTIL I MET THIS WORLD’S TOP SPELL CASTER. HE IS REALLY POWERFUL AND COULD HELP CAST SPELLS TO BRING BACK ONE’S GONE,LOST,MISBEHAVING LOVER AND MAGIC MONEY SPELL OR SPELL FOR A GOOD JOB.I’M NOW HAPPY & A LIVING TESTIMONY COS THE WOMAN I HAD WANTED TO MARRY LEFT ME 2 WEEKS BEFORE OUR WEDDING AND MY LIFE WAS UPSIDE DOWN COS OUR RELATIONSHIP HAS BEEN ON FOR 2YEARS… I REALLY LOVED HIM, BUT HIS MOTHER WAS AGAINST US AND HE HAD NO GOOD PAYING JOB. SO WHEN I MET THIS SPELL CASTER, I TOLD HIM WHAT HAPPENED AND EXPLAINED THE SITUATION OF THINGS TO HIM..AT FIRST I WAS UNDECIDED,SKEPTICAL AND DOUBTFUL, BUT I JUST GAVE IT A TRY. AND IN 7 DAYS WHEN I RETURNED TO USA, MY GIRLFRIEND(NOW WIFE) CALLED ME BY HERSELF AND CAME TO ME APOLOGIZING THAT EVERYTHING HAD BEEN SETTLED WITH HIS MOM AND FAMILY AND SHE GOT A NEW JOB INTERVIEW SO WE SHOULD GET MARRIED..I DIDN’T BELIEVE IT COS THE SPELL CASTER ONLY ASKED FOR MY NAME AND MY GIRLFRIENDS NAME AND ALL I WANTED HIM TO DO… WELL WE ARE HAPPILY MARRIED NOW AND WE ARE EXPECTING OUR LITTLE KID,AND MY WIFE ALSO GOT THE NEW JOB AND OUR LIVES BECAME MUCH BETTER. IN CASE ANYONE NEEDS THE SPELL CASTER FOR SOME HELP, HIS EMAIL ADDRESS IS;ayokospellcaster@gmail.com ……HOPE HE HELPS YOU OUT OUR OPPORTUNITY … CONTACT THIS GREAT SPELL CASTER VIA EMAIL:ayokospellcaster@gmail.com…
.com ……HOPE HE HELPS YOU OUT OUR OPPORTUNITY … CONTACT THIS GREAT SPELL CASTER VIA EMAIL:ayokospellcaster@gmail.com…
Comment by james westley — April 29, 2013 @ 5:03 am