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April 2, 2013

Married Boss - what could go wrong?

Filed under: Advice — posted by Breakup Girl @ 9:40 am

Double trouble on December 14, 1998

Dear Breakup Girl,

My boss and I have this incredible chemistry between us. We get along so well, and he has many of the qualities I would look for in a man. However he is married (and my boss!). Lately, he makes a lot of comments about me, like jokingly, but like he is trying to see how I feel about him. Recently, he invited me out for Happy Hour Friday after work and told me that he’d like to spend more time with me, but can’t ask me to do things because his wife is jealous of me. (And I met his wife only once!) We haven’t spoken of any related issues since that night. He also said that night at the bar, that if he weren’t my boss and weren’t married he would like to get involved with me. But it’s almost as if he said that to see if I would accept those conditions, almost proposing an affair to me (my gut level feeling). I told him, “in some other dimension” we could get involved but not like this. We haven’t spoken about that night/conversation since then, but he constantly talks to me at work and I catch him looking at me often. I know the right thing to do is to NOT get involved, yet we are so attracted to one another. HELP!

– Meg

Dear Meg,

Three words: DON’T GO THERE. Fourth dimension? Not even there.

Attraction? Fine. Doesn’t mean you need to act on it. Two words: window shopping.

Incredible chemistry with your boss? Great. Then you’ll be an excellent employee. Right?

But if the chem has crossed the line from inspiration to distraction, then one word: transfer.

For a situation this complicated, it really is that simple.

Breakup Girl


  1. [...] Breakup Girl Share this: Did you enjoy this article? Tweet Share the Love Get Free Updates [...]

    Pingback by Married Boss - what could go wrong? - Epic Date Night — April 5, 2013 @ 7:02 pm

  2. Hey Meg, though I am a guy I have been in this position before. There was a chemistry that was undeiniable and lots of playful flirting. We ended up going out for drinks and one thing lead to another. Needless to say, things were uncomfortable until I finished that job. When its your boss, be really careful. Can turn out both ways. What did you end up doing? If you avoided it, what helped?

    Comment by Karl — July 31, 2013 @ 3:18 pm

  3. Hi Karl! Always happy to see you here! Love, BG

    Comment by Breakup Girl — August 4, 2013 @ 10:43 pm

  4. totally off topic but is it just me or is there more spam on here than usual, lots of spellcasters…

    Comment by karen hiebert — August 5, 2013 @ 10:05 am

  5. Karen! You are correct. I gotta get in there and clean stuff up. UNLESS OF COURSE THEY ARE CORRECT ABOUT THE EFFECTIVE SPELLCASTING AND THEY WILL STOP M

    Comment by Breakup Girl — August 7, 2013 @ 10:08 pm

  6. I was just looking up Break Up Girl to give the cautionary tale to Grace Helbig, who recently made a YouTube video in which she called out to Oprah after her previous employer kept all her content after their contract ended last year.

    And I am so glad to find out that Lynn owns Break Up Girl again!

    Comment by MntlWard — January 23, 2014 @ 10:32 am

  7. Hey thanks! I’ll pass that along to both Lynn and BG. ;-)

    Comment by Chris — January 24, 2014 @ 5:56 am

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