Courtney E. Martin had an interesting piece at The American Prospect the other day about the ways in which the legalization — here and there (but not there) — of gay marriage and has prompted her to reevaluate her own aversion to the tying of the knot. As a feminist wary of wedlock myself, I can’t help but nod along with her argument that historically, marriage is both heterosexist and just plain sexist. At the same time, it’s hard for a straight gal to condemn an institution that once considered women property at the same time that her gay friends are happily flocking to California to make their love public, official, and legit in the eyes of the very law that heretofore shut them out.

(more…)

Riddle: What’s the opposite of a breakup?

Answer: Frequently married — to each other! — porn star Annie Sprinkle and butch multi-media artist Elizabeth Stephens.

Yep, the super-committed couple is at it again — for the fourth time, and they’re counting. Yesterday marked the momentous occasion of Annie and Beth’s wedding — their fourth annual, this one with a green eco-love theme.

As part of a seven-year project of their collaboration the Love Art Lab, Sprinkles and Stevens get married once a year for seven years. Each wedding corresponds to the color and properties of one of the seven chakras.

Just a few of the reasons Annie and Beth’s relationship might inspire the pants off you:

They met when they were younger but fell in love “later in life;” they are a successful collaborative team; they turn love and sex into art; they aren’t afraid of love or commitment, or at least do a bang-up job of overcoming those fears; the hell — the first three times – with the ban on gay marriage; Annie beat breast cancer in their first year of marriage; they are openly sex-positive; they tried to have a baby but when it didn’t work opted for a black lab; they encourage others by sharing their story; they are just cute as pie.

And now that gay marriage has been legalized in California (finally!) their lastest nuptial might spread love into the world with more than costumes and performance art. After all, what says “Congratulations on your continued connubiality” more than shared health benefits and hospital visitation rights?

You know you want to see pictures from weddings one, two and three….

Now, thanks to the California Supreme Court, you can — as you’ve likely heard by now — get married somewhere other than Massachusetts. Yes, there may be icky political repercussions down the line, but for now let us just say: mazal tov!

On stands today: Riverdale’s “hot new guy,” who’s gay. Yes, that Riverdale, home of Archie, Jughead, Betty, and now Kevin, who is really, really, not interested in Veronica. As comics fans first heard in the spring, “the most mainstream, Middle-American comic book” — which last made headlines with a good old-fashioned traditional marriage — has now officially gone the way of, well, actual communities with gay people in them. Win.

What’s extra-cool here, as Barbara Spindel reports in the Daily Beast, is how — how mellowly — the gayness is presented and framed. “After Kevin and Jughead enjoy some homosocial bonding at a hamburger-eating contest, Jughead warns the new kid that Veronica isn’t likely to stop pursuing him until he returns her flirtations. ‘It’s nothing against her. I’m gay,’ Kevin explains nonchalantly, showing how much more casual coming out has become since the X-Men superhero Northstar made headlines in 1992 with this clunky announcement: ‘For while I am not inclined to discuss my sexuality with people for whom it is none of their business — I am gay!'”

Also, Spindel notes, the fact that he’s gay does not become the plot. Instead, it gets absorbed right in as the basis of some true-to-Archie-world hijinks: “Far from being labored, Kevin’s coming out feels entirely relevant to a comic book about how teens relate. What’s more, Parent uses Kevin’s sexuality as an ingenious plot device that fits seamlessly within the well-worn Archie narrative. ‘Kevin is going to tell her that he’s gay, but Jughead tells him not to because he enjoys seeing Veronica making a fool of herself,’ [veteran Archie artist Dan Parent] explains. ‘Everyone knows he’s gay except Veronica. Betty doesn’t push it because she realizes if Veronica is chasing Kevin then she’s got the time for Archie.'”

Setting aside my only concern — Veronica’s gaydar clearly needs to go into the shop — what I also like here is the reminder of connection made between gayness and wholesomeness (if, indeed, wholesomeness is to be considered a worthy goal). Gay here (and in real life) does not (necessarily) equal subversive, alterna-,  Adam Lambert, or “worse.” Why, the gays fit right in, see? That’s what always puzzled me, in a certain way, about the whole gay marriage thing. It’s like, “People. We scared you when we were flamboyant and counter culture. Now we’re trying to settle down, just like you, and you’re really freaked out?!”

Speaking of marriage — and perhaps the best news of all — Archie Comic Publications editor in chief Victor Gorelick noted to the Daily Beast that protest was much more vociferous when the news broke that Archie would marry Veronica. Perhaps we can look forward to seeing Riverdale celebrate the wedding of Kevin and, I don’t know, Steve?

Via On Top:

Openly lesbian Cambridge, Massachusetts Mayor E. Denise Simmons will marry her longtime partner Mattie B. Hayes Sunday, August 30. The couple will exchange vows in a predominantly African-American church, a possible historic first.

“I believe this may be the very first African-American church to hold a same gender wedding, and that’s something that just wouldn’t have happened years ago,” Simmons said in a press release.

“But times are changing, people are becoming more accepting of their fellow citizens, and we are slowly arriving at more of a ‘live-and-let-live’ kind of world,” she added.

The ceremony will take place at the historic St. Bartholomew’s Episcopal Church near Harvard Square and will be conducted by Rev. Leslie K. Sterling.

The announcement of an Episcopal Church blessing a lesbian marriage comes quick on the heels of a historic church vote that gives bishops the discretion to bless gay unions, especially in states where gay marriage or civil unions are legal.

The state of Massachusetts was the first to legalize gay marriage five years ago. Since then over 16,000 gay and lesbian couples have exchanged vows in the state.

In 2008, Simmons made history when she became the nation’s first openly lesbian African-American mayor. She replaced Kenneth Reeves, America’s first openly gay African-American mayor.

“It’s not an easy process, and there have certainly been some detours along the way,” Simmons said about the acceptance of gay men and lesbians in society, “but I think all the kind words I’ve received about this ceremony suggest we’re living in a friendlier, more open society. Our society is definitely making progress.”

Only 44 more to go! (We’re talking to you, New York.)

And speaking again of parents, from the New York Times:

Racially segregated proms have been held in Montgomery County — where about two-thirds of the population is white — almost every year since its schools were integrated in 1971. Such proms are, by many accounts, longstanding traditions in towns across the rural South, though in recent years a number of communities have successfully pushed for change.

/snip/ Students of both races say that interracial friendships are common at Montgomery County High School. Black and white students also date one another, though often out of sight of judgmental parents. “Most of the students do want to have a prom together,” says Terra Fountain, a white 18-year-old who graduated from Montgomery County High School last year and is now living with her black boyfriend. “But it’s the white parents who say no. … They’re like, if you’re going with the black people, I’m not going to pay for it.”

Interesting corollary, from the same issue of the Times magazine:

According to the group Freedom to Marry, about 13 percent of Americans now live in a state that allows gay marriage or recognizes marriage licenses issued in other states, and that percentage is certain to rise. The gist of the disagreement now isn’t partisan or theological as much as it is generational. Unlike their parents, younger Americans and those now transitioning into middle age have had openly gay friends and colleagues all their lives, and they understand homosexuality to be a form of biological happenstance rather than of emotional disturbance. They’re less inclined to restrict the personal decisions of gay Americans, even if they don’t necessarily want the whole thing explained to their children as part of some politically correct grade-school curriculum. In a sense, the gay rights movement of an earlier era was so successful in changing social attitudes that the movement itself can now seem obsolete, in the same way that younger Americans who have grown up with the premise of environmentalism in their daily lives consider Greenpeace to be a kind of hippie anachronism.

1. Watch venomous anti-gay marriage ad entitled “A Gathering Storm.”

2. Hear lines such as “The clouds are dark, and the winds are strong, and I am afraid. Some who advocate for same-sex marriage have taken the issue far beyond same-sex couples. They want to bring the issue into my life. My freedom will be taken away.” Snarf Frappuccino.

3. Cleanse palate below. UPDATED! N.O.M. was able to have the hilarious Weather Girls remix of their ad taken down! So… 3. You click around YouTube looking for another posting of it and notice with a chuckle just how many parodies there are of this putrid ad and then…

4. Settle on watching Lizz Winstead’s preposterously non-sequitur-filled take on the subject:

We’re pretty sure Vermont’s Republican governor was installed by extraterrestrials in the first place. And in this human v. alien battle, the good guys have won one for civil rights. As Reuters just reported: “Vermont lawmakers on Tuesday overrode a veto from the governor in passing a bill that would allow same-sex marriage, clearing the way for the state to become the fourth in the nation where gay marriage is legal.” [Insert visual: BG high-fiving Ben, Jerry.]

Connecticut ruling overturns ban on gay marriage.