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December 11

Ambivalent, but torn

Filed under: Advice — posted by Breakup Girl @ 10:49 am

Rubbed the wrong way on March 16, 1998

Dear Breakup Girl,

I have a platonic/romantic relationship with my masseur, who has been my companion to movies and dinner [for the last four months]. He’s nearly 20 years older. We are remarkably compatible, except that he’s jealous of my busy work and social life, saying that he gave all that up when he was a lawyer to pursue massaging — a more relaxing lifestyle. Anyway, I was getting tired of his mixed messages of “I love you, but I’m too old for you” — and so I decided to see less of him. At first he blamed me for my “change in priorities.” Now, he is really chasing me, calling or paging me everyday. I don’t always return his calls, which he isn’t happy about. I am feeling ambivalent, but torn. What is going on here?

— Anastasia

Dear Anastasia,

First of all, “ambivalent” and “torn” are the same thing. Second of all, platonic and romantic are not. Neither are “relaxing lifestyle” and “calling or paging me every day.” If Monsieur Masseur truly followed his dream and left the great American legal tradition for the Great American Back Rub, more power to him. But no fair for him to pass judgement on your lifestyle and get all less-busy-than-thou. He’s clearly still defensive about his shift to life in the slower lane. Find someone else to get the knots out of your back while he works out the kinks in his life.

Breakup Girl


June 10

Now at MSN.com: For love or money?

Filed under: Advice — posted by Breakup Girl @ 2:50 am

Here, your weekly installment of Ask Lynn, BG’s alter ego’s column at MSN.com (powered by Match.com). This week, we meet “For Love Or Money?” who asks Lynn to resolve an age-old question: “Who’s right: me or my Mom?”

Also, this age-old question: “When it comes to love, how much does money matter?”

A lot, if you ask FLOM’s mom, who says that since FLOM makes a lot of money, she should get involved only with men who make even more. FLOM, for her part, isn’t so sure. And she’s getting tired of mom asking, “How much does he make?” (instead of, say, “Does he treat you right and make you happy?”).

So. Who is right? Read the great debate, and then come back here to comment!


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