Lacking mom genes on August 31, 1998…
Dear Breakup Girl,
I’m stuck so I thought I’d write…I’ve been with the same guy (my first love) for 13 years and married for ten of them. I’m 30, he’s 37 and we met when I was 17. He’s considerate, kind, caring, funny, intelligent, a hard worker and throughout the whole period we’ve been together we’ve rarely argued. He’s my best friend, a wonderful lover and my family think he’s great.
Unfortunately though, there’s a problem…He comes from a *large* family and has often mentioned the idea of having kids. I, however, have never had a maternal streak, have a successful career and a huge desire to travel extensively. I NEVER misled him about this…..I always made it perfectly clear right from the start that I wasn’t “motherly” and at the very least couldn’t begin to contemplate starting a family without having travelled and achieved what I wanted to do in life first. Things have become increasingly rutlike over the past year and it’s reached a point of stalemate. He’s not content with the childless life and won’t travel because he wants kids, and I don’t want family (if at all) until I’ve done everything I want to do in life and in my career. He’s mentioned that he thought I would change as I grew older but I haven’t (at least not in the way he would have preferred.)