Via Broadsheet:

Yes, it’s happened again. An expert has proclaimed that single women, despite their protestations to the contrary, are completely miserable. According to Pam Spurr, an author and psychologist, single women who assert they are happy with their lives despite “their crushing loneliness and desperation” are not merely deluded, but outright lying. How does she know? Body language.

Upon talking with a woman at a party, who had every semblance of confidence, maturity and fulfillment (every semblance, that is, except for a ring on the all-important finger), the subject of sex and marriage came up. The sex therapist recounts:

“She immediately described herself as happily single. And yet her body language told another story: Chloe crossed her arms defensively over her chest until I just wanted to shout: ‘Yes my dear, now try pulling another one.'”

Hmm. You don’t suppose her body language seemed defensive because she realized she was talking to a hostile busybody eager to make snap judgments about her life on the spot and write disparagingly about her in an international newspaper, do you?

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Apparently it’s not just wine that gets better with age. According to a study by Yang Yang, a University of Chicago sociologist, the happiest Americans are the oldest Americans — and one thing those happy seniors are not is lonely. Yang believes that’s because older people have, in general, learned to be more content with what they have than younger folks.

As a case in point, Florida’s Highlands Today featured Lou and Dottie Mingacci, who have been married 62 years. Lou’s Wednesday morning Bingo outings represent his rare moments of separation from his beloved, the World War II vet tells the paper. When asked what keeps him happy, Mingacci quickly replies: his wife.

Isn’t it nice to have something to look forward to?

Also via Broadsheet:

Every so often you wonder if they come up with the title first, then the show.

The press release in question from WE tv:

“Understandably, every bride wants her wedding day to be picture perfect and that means that her gown must be stunning and fit like a glove. A new Cornell study reports that more than 70 percent of brides-to-be are on a mission to lose weight before their big day. All-new series, WE tv’s BULGING BRIDES [Yep!] premieres an all-new episode on Sunday, February 24 at 10pm / 9c. … The latest installment … follows Heidi, a constant procrastinator [and bad person], who has been putting off plans for her upcoming nuptials [because FAT people are shiftless].

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From American Sexuality Magazine, via Alternet: Psychologist Bella DePaulo, author of Singled Out: How Singles Are Stereotyped, Stigmatized, and Ignored, and Still Live Happily Ever After, takes time out from her busy, fulfilled single life to re-examine the pileup of studies informing the accepted wisdom that married people are happier than unmarrieds. Re-crunching the numbers — such as they are — she finds that while many married people are quite content, it may not be marriage that makes them that way (and vice-versa); at the end of the long, not-so-lonely day, there’s really not much difference in the happy factor between singles and marrieds at at all. To the degree that there is, DePaulo writes, “Single people are not as happy as married people in part because they are targets of stereotyping and discrimination.” Also, zombies.