var mess = new Array(
'There is no such thing as "breaking up with someone without hurting their feelings."',
'Let your Ex be mad because you broke up with him/her. Not because of HOW you broke up with him/her.',
'Mean is bad,<br> but BLUNT is fine.',
'"Breaking up sucks" is true, but it is not a good reason not to break up.',
'Mixed feelings after a breakup are normal breakup aftermath -- not necessarily evidence against the breakup&#146;s wisdom.',
'Do not ask WHY.',
'Exes do not help Exes through breakups.',
'Do not fool around with someone in order to get over someone, especially if it&#146;s that person.',
'Revenge makes you look bad. And when you look bad, you feel worse.',
'Seeing someone new and having moved on are unrelated.',
'"Over someone" comes sooner than you think. If you let it.',
'The reunion process is more than a matter of "please be kind, rewind."',
'"The rules," ladies and gentlemen, are manners.',
'Early in a relationship, your presents should not be commanding.',
'You can&#146;t MAKE anyone do anything.',
'The only people you should be having sex with are the people you can talk with about having safer sex.',
'Don&#146;t create some fool&#146;s gold standard of full disclosure and ask each other more about the past than you really want to know.',
'People ending marriages do not speak any sort of meaningful, consistent language to the person they&#146;re seeing while they&#146;re doing it.',
'No mercy marriages. There are few things harder than breaking up. Marriage is one of them.',
'When calls are measured by wait, not volume, some settling may occur. Don&#146;t let it.',
'You either want a relationship or you don&#146;t. No one, not even the President, is "too busy for a relationship" s/he really wants.',
'For an office romance to be worth the risk, you must have a hunch that comes from your gut, not from your fourth margarita at the "Office Ole!" fiesta.',
'When you ask someone out, do not "be yourself."',
'Whoever invited pays.',
'Ladies, there are PLENTY of nice straight guys left. Though it would be helpful if they had some sort of parade.',
'The Internet is an excellent place to meet people. But if you think waiting by the phone is lame, try waiting by the computer.',
'To get over a breakup, I prescribe Grecian Formula: One trip to Crete + one great little dress = one man, out of hair.',
'You know it&#146;s a relapse -- and not a reunion -- when you see your ex and you say to yourself, "Wow. You look great...without committment."',
'Sex is the only activity that makes reasonable people think things like, "Does darkness make me look fat?"',
'Think you haven&#146;t moved on? There might still be a little piece of your ex stuck to your back -- but it&#146;s on your back, not in your way.',
'Don&#146;t assume that all other third wheels are single losers. Because you&#146;re single and you&#146;re not a loser.',
'The opposite of nice is not jerk.');
var max = mess.length;
var num = Math.floor((Math.random() * max));
document.writeln(mess[num]);