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Dear Breakup Girl,

Okay, here is my problem: I met this boy. I like him a whole lot. He is funny and smart, we have lots in common, and I really like being with him. But I am just not attracted to him. At all. Like, borderline repulsed. But, I am dating him, because personality-wise he's such an awesome catch, and I'm hoping he'll...grow on me. My mom always said that looks aren't what really matters, but Cynthia Heimel said if you don't want to rip his clothes off you're wasting your time. Am I being stupid and unfair by dating him, or by not being excited about it?

--Pink Molly

Dear Pink Molly,

It is a truism that spiritual love breeds physical attraction. But "borderline repulsed" does not strike me as a fertile growing medium for "growing on you." Conventional good looks we can (should) get by without, but subjective je-ne-sais-chemistry, not so much. Decide which one's in play for you. And then decide, as one so often must, between the advice of your mother and that of Cynthia Heimel. And if you choose both of the latters, then do so without guilt.

Love,
Breakup Girl

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