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Dear Breakup Girl,

I've been engaged for 13 years; we have lived together for 11. He wanted to wait until I finished graduate school to get married. It's been two years since I graduated.

Now he says he likes things the way they are, and doesn't want to get married. I am 40-years-old. I feel lied to. He doesn't want to compromise at all.

Should I just pack my bags? I love him, but sometimes I question if I am in love with him .

-- Brenda

Dear Brenda,

Thirteen years is a loooooong time, and -- depending -- a number that can bring good luck or bad. Good: you'll realize that you've been holding out for a ceremony/title/legal bond that at this point seems beside the point, as in "Law, schmaw...we've got love."

Or -- Bad -- do you? If it weren't for your last sentence, I'd probably suggest a BG-style ultimatum. But it sounds like your suitcases are already on the bed, whether you realized/admitted it before now or not. So perhaps your lucky number is actually 40. As in "Life Begins At...."

Love,
Breakup Girl

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