Rite of Spring:
Adding Heat, Getting Chemistry
or, Is That a Vernal Equinox In Your Pocket or Are You Just Happy to See
by Sherise Dorf
So, the days are a little longer, and you choose to take a long, leisurely
stroll home from work rather than smoosh yourself onto a crowded train. And
as you walk, congratulating sexy, sexy you for doing three-inch open-toed mules
so early in the season, you find yourself gazing out into the general public.
And it's at this point, even behind those stylin' new sunglasses,
that you make eye contact.
Yes! Eye contact in the crowded city! You realize you're smiling (naughty you!)
and suddenly, (this is so Ally McBeal of you) you find yourself at a bar sitting
across from the object and cause of your provocative smile. And, over Pear-tinis
or whatever alcoholic concoction you're drinking these days, you think to yourself,
"I'm the luckiest girl -- whoops -- woman in the world!"
Are you in love? Are you glowing? Are your palms wet? Have you failed to hear
a word he's said since he swept you off your perfectly pedicured feet and into
the nearest watering hole?
Fellas! Do you find yourselves dumbstruck by women in the street? Are you smiling
sweetly and -- somehow -- murmuring, "Gee, I really like your Kate
Spade"? Are you taking phone numbers and then actually dialing them? Committing
to dates on weekend nights? Letting friends set you up with women with cats?
May I Take Your Coat? And Sweater? And Shirt? And...
Spring comes but once a year, and when it does, it sends singletons from Santa
Monica to Soho into a collective flurry to find Mr. or Ms. Right Ç- for the
right or the wrong reasons. What is it about spring that aids and abets us in
our search for love... or at the very, very least, a fling to remember?
1. People are taking off their coats.
This sends a sign to interested parties that the barriers are coming down.
One less layer of stuff to get to the real you that's hiding inside.
2. People have a leisurely "notice me" pace.
You can actually check out desirable women or men -- and take note of things
like wedding bands -- when they're strolling by the lake, lounging in the
park, and so on. It's much more difficult when they're wearing overcoats,
jumping in and out of cabs, scurrying into buildings with heat.
3. People are going out, not staying in.
If you ask someone out on a date in winter, you've got the "promise of coziness"
factor working for you, but little else. Chances are, you've got inches of
snow to contend with, your date won't wear shoes she considers sexy, and after
eating "comfort food" on a cold and snowy night, the first thing on most people's
minds is running home to dive under the down comforter... to sleep.
But come spring, kick off bulky boots in favor of strappy sandals, toss aside
wool for finer fabrics; suddenly the desire to crash becomes the desire to crush.
Caution! Cute Shoulders Ahead!
One springtime disclaimer: when following your pheromones, be sure you check
in with your head every so often to make sure you're avoiding the pitfalls of
throwing yourself out there heart first. Just because spring rhymes with fling
doesn't make it any safer.
All right! Ready to put yourself out there, for better or worse? Optimists,
Take thee to the park! Or nearest schoolyard!
got a friend who moves to a new city every year. And every year, not only does
he make new friends, but he dates plenty of women. Is he incredibly handsome?
Not really. Is this a guy who always knows what to say and when to say it? Nope.
Then how does he do it? Ultimate Frisbee.
When he plays, every weekend, he's surrounded by team spirit, the great outdoors,
and sweaty members of the opposite sex. And after an afternoon spent running,
jumping, and hurling a disc in various directions, he's got the one thing that
will ensure he asks someone to join him for a drink: adrenalin. Coming soon
to large green expanse near you.
If I ask one more friend how he or she met his or her new girlfriend/boyfriend/fiance/wife/husband
and the answer is "learning to dance," I'll... I'll... open a dance studio of my
own. Apparently, the lure of the smooth, open dance floor, the click-click of
a would-be paramour's heels on that shiny wood, the swaying skirts, it's too
much to resist. It's so strong, people even find themselves in the mood for
an uncoordinated foxtrot with total strangers. Swing, samba, or salsa. Choose
your step, then sign up solo for a
class. Before you know it, you'll be dancing cheek-to-someone-else's-cheek.
Get Inside Out
While everyone else is hiking, running on the beach, playing polo, don't forget
you'll want to find a place to cool off. Make a list of movie
theaters (air conditioning) and cool
museums (shadey, but with garden cafes). You can even take advantage of
the fact that non-spring-type places will be less crowded. Find yourself an
ice skating rink, and while whipping
around on rental skates, check out your fellow skaters. Plan your graceful spill
strategically so you just happen to be sprawled at the feet (and mercy) of the
one you think is most attractive. Clever you. It'll be a great story to tell
Walk It Off
Walking tours are the perfect
solution for the less athletically inclined amongst us to spend a day (or morning)
outdoors, accompanied by a variety of people that share our specific interests.
Surveying architecture, art, or neighborhoods, the best thing about this type
of group activity is that if there's anyone there that vaguely resembles you
in the way of age or style, the two of you will be drawn toward each other -
as if in a dream.
Ah, springtime! It's all about getting out there and learning something new,
pushing yourself to new limits, tackling -- ahem -- a new "interest." And most
of all, it's about enjoying the fact that wherever you go, whatever you do,
now that it's spring, you won't have to figure out where the hell to stow your
Sherise Dorf gets her fair share of sunshine, living as she does in L.A.
When she last graced the BTD, she elucidated us on You
2.0: Upgrading Your Bad Self.
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