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June 28

Are you being too picky?

Filed under: Advice — posted by Breakup Girl @ 7:10 am

PLEASE read (BG alter-ego) Lynn Harris’ new article for match.com if your online profile looks anything like this:

Me: otherwise easygoing SF, 29, in desirable neighborhood near excellent schools and world-class cheese market. You: 31-36, Ivy League (except Penn), minimum 5’ 10″, maximum 180 lbs., pectoral-to-waist ratio .33; fiscal conservative/social liberal; profession: law, medicine, banking (employer must have innovative paternity leave policy); hobbies: pan-Asian cooking, helping the needy, foot rubs; civil to (but not “friends” with) ex-girlfriends (maximum: 2); informed, witty, self-starter: equally comfortable chatting at state dinners and changing tires. Send introductory email along with photo, high school and college transcripts, 3 recommendations (1 academic, 1 professional, 1 non-threatening friend-girl) plus two 750-word essays on the topics: (1) “A Man of Quality is Not Threatened By A Woman For Equality” and (2) “Why I Always Share My Feelings.”


April 23

I enjoy long walks, red flags

Filed under: News — posted by Breakup Girl @ 7:39 am

Single superhero, smart/cute/funny, enjoys world travel and spicy food, seeks that one special reporter who will not get sucked into writing yet ANOTHER unbalanced story about how internet dating is dangerous and SCAAAAAAAAAAARY.

The latest dispatch, from CNN, reports that more and more people (mostly women, I guess) are becoming victims of “romance fraud:” scams by would-be suitors “designed to prey on [their] emotions to get [their] money.” (Wait. Doesn’t that describe the wedding industry? Har.) There’s even a website called RomanceScams.org, with tips for avoiding romance fraud and help for those who fell prey. Founder Barb Sluppick told CNN that the site, now three years old, has over 30,000 members: 833 have reported financial losses totaling $8,244,800.05.

Okay, that’s a lot of money for new “work boots” and (yes) wedding expenses. I’m not saying this info’s not newsworthy or troubling in and of itself, or that people shouldn’t be aware of red flags. (Like, er, being asked for lots of money by someone who “owns a diamond mine.”) But a little context would be nice. Like the fact that Match.com alone has a membership of 15 million, which is a lot more than 833. Or the notion that the Interwebs are not the only domain of scammers, or even of jerks and meanies. Just because you meet someone at a party does not mean he or she is telling the truth about needing help, just this once, with a car payment. Or how about the flipside: that while, yes, heartbreak — sometimes the illegal kind — happens online (and elsewhere), so does the opposite. You know, love and happily ever after. I don’t know why some are still so hellbent on portraying dating sites as some sort of giant maximum security prison network. To the eleven of you who still haven’t tried online dating: be aware, but don’t be scared.


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