Intellectualizing on August 31, 1998…

Dear Breakup Girl,

I never even get that far. I want to be in a committed relationship so much and I never, ever manage to even have a boyfriend or dates past one or two.

What on earth is wrong with me? I’m a little overweight but I am sexy (even I can tell that) and objectively, I am probably more attractive than any woman who happens to be with someone I desire. Furthermore, I actually am very smart and very, very well-educated (abroad). My friend (a journalist) says I am an intellectual posing as a babe. That pretty much sums it up, really. ( I say all this because most people totally overestimate their looks and intelligence.)

Everyone I am attracted to wants or is involved with someone else. Always. The holidays used to be a dull ache but now they feel like stabs in my face, sharp and so painful.

I am very scared of ending up alone. Christmas is already starting to make me cry and we’re just in August. I just don’t know why I am being punished like this.

And by the way, I used to blame this feeling on where I come from which is a rural area. Since then, I have lived on two additional continents and three countries, in each case looking for love (if I have to admit that). Obviously the problem is with me and I am scared of always being alone or having to settle (which I think I would never do).

I am 30 years old by the way.

— Scared and Loveless

BG’s advice after the jump!

In a society where even the most outgoing of girls succumb to insecurity by their teenage years, it’s difficult to find young female models of confidence and integrity in our popular culture. The New York Times recently explained this struggle best: “Who are you supposed to be, or to avoid becoming? A nerd? A ditz? A flirt? A tomboy? What kind of role models are those make-believe princesses, those Bratz and Barbies, to say nothing of the real-life Britneys, Lindsays and Mileys? Mean Girls, Gossip Girls, Girls Gone Wild, Girl Power, You go, girl! What’s a girl to do?”

It turns out girls need look no further than the silver screen for their answer. In the midst of a summer dominated by hulking male superhero flicks, the American Girl global-domination industrial complex franchise has released their first feature film, “Kit Kittredge.” (more…)