During the most unwieldy parts of my pregnancies, the only way I could sleep was by spooning a huge plaid pregnancy pillow called something embarrassing like a Snoozle, or a Froogle, or a Foshizzle, or something or other. With me in my comfy flannel PJs, my pillow and I looked like a huge plaid G-clef, and my husband looked left out. Which is simply to say that yes, I know and embrace the wonder of a well-placed body pillow.
But now there is the Funktiontide — or at least there might be, says its designer Stefan Ulrich — and now, remarkably, we may behold something perhaps even more unsettling than the Real Doll. Ulrich says his pillow prototype, which would use advanced robotics and artificial muscle technology to move and change shape depending on how you hold it, is but a polymer harbinger of the day when bleak, alienated humans will turn to “robots” for emotional satisfaction. (Yeah, like I didn’t already do that with my second husband. Folks!) That, or as we see in this technically G-rated, but somehow NSFW video, maybe the Funktiontide is nothing more than a Shmoo with benefits.
While the video’s human co-star appears rather satisfied with his lot, Ulrich is not unaware that his Pillbury Dough-bot raises some juicy issues. “…[T]he the work’s intention is to create a provocative picture for discussion, which enables us to question how much we want technological products to satisfy our emotional needs,” goes his commentary. “The ambiguity of this scenario is, that it could be understood as a solution to a wide range of different kinds of loneliness. But it might as well be understood as a scenario which should be avoided by all means possible.” Speaking as someone who practically sleeps with her iPhone, I’m sure I have no idea what he’s talking about.
Struggling with the ultimate romantic choice? The one you’ve got vs. the one that got away? Familiar and stable vs. fizzy and exciting? Veronica vs. Betty?
Well, envy Archie.* Looks like our man in Riverdale may get to have it both ways.
As today’s Times reports: “That perennially teenage redhead…made headlines around the world when word leaked, back in May, that he would propose to his longtime love interest, Veronica Lodge, in issue No. 600 of the comic that bears his name. But that issue, published in August, was only Part 1 of a six-part story. Although Archie did marry Veronica, things will take a turn in November, when Archie proposes to the lady in waiting, Betty Cooper. That’s just the latest twist in the romantic triangle that has thrust this nearly 70-year-old character, and his parent company, into the media spotlight.”
How’s he gonna pull that off? Easy: alternate universe! “The wedding story was written by Michael E. Uslan and illustrated by Stan Goldberg, a longtime ‘Archie’ artist. The first half was called ‘Archie Marries Veronica,’ but issue No. 603, on sale next month, is called ‘Archie Marries Betty.’ The end of bachelorhood began in issue No. 600, in which Archie found himself on a road named Memory Lane, which he has often traveled. This time he walked a different direction and encountered a fork in the road. He chose the left path, which allowed him to see his future with Veronica and their twins, and himself working for her tycoon father. At the end of the October issue, No. 602, Archie goes for an evening stroll and encounters the fork again. In the November issue Archie will find himself back in Riverdale High, this time envisioning a future with Betty as his wife. (A set of twins factors into this destiny as well.)”
(Doctor Who fans will recall when this totally happened to Donna Noble, only instead of twins there was a giant bug. And — Halloween preview — let’s not forget Breakup Girl Friday in Ghost Ex!)
But the question remains: who do you think he should wind up with? (“Jughead” would of course be a revolutionary twist, but I don’t think we’re there yet.)
Filed under: Treats — posted by Breakup Girl @ 11:56 am
Via BuzzFeed: A Brooklyn artist beautifully illustrates the sweet, elegiac art of the “missed connection.”
Even if ” white guy, brown hair, blue/white striped shirt, earphones, red book” never again sees “white girl, brown hair, nosering, headphones, blue book,” their would-be love will be brought to life here.
Filed under: Advice,News,Treats — posted by Breakup Girl @ 8:49 am
Perhaps you recall this no-longer-lovelorn letter from Cheryl, who’d been head over hizzeells with her boss, though he “never gave [her] any reason to think he was the least bit interested.” Well! After moving to a better job, she told us, she — per BG’s advice, ahem — gave it one shot with him, and…cue wedding chapel bells! Here is the happy couple, Cheryl just wrote to tell us, on their happy day, lucky 9-09-09. Congratulations!
Disclaimer: Remember, the goal of life/love/this website is not GET MARRIEDMARRIEDMARRIEDMARRIED. (Or even DON’TBESINGLESINGLESINGLE.) You’ve got enough people telling you that. We just want you to be happy — whatever that looks like for you. Cheers!
Tim Gunn is taking his fight against fashion crimes from the workrooms of “Project Runway” to the pages of a comic book. And, wow, does he get to wear a power suit.
The “Loaded Gunn” story line — to save an exhibit of extraordinary superhero clothes from a cadre of villains — is part of a book that reintroduces a group of Marvel’s high-fashion “Models Inc.” comic characters from the 1960s.
“It’s a little `America’s Next Top Model’ — without Tyra (Banks) — and a little `Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles,'” says Marvel editor Charlie Beckerman.
The Gunn project evolved on a whim, but it turned out Gunn was a childhood comic fan and a good sport, Beckerman says.
Gunn says the experience has been “the most bizarre thing.”
“It’s exciting and exhilarating, but bizarre. When they came to me, I said, `I’m about to turn 56 years old. Are they crazy?’ But it kept revealing itself in layers and next thing, I’m wearing the `Iron Man’ suit. I was dumbstruck.”
Personally, Gunn says he always fancied himself more of a Batman type, but he’s pleased with the result.
“Most superheroes are fighting the same thing — good vs. evil — but who’s taking on crimes against fashion? Me!”
The biggest offense, hands down: clothes that don’t fit properly, Gunn says. And, if he had the truly incredible power to remove one item from closets all around the world, no question it would be Crocs.
“It’s the No. 1 fashion crime item — and I see it a lot,” Gunn says.
Now, I love Etsy. But a life-size wall decal of Edward Cullen? To put “on the back of your bedroom door so he can be intrigued while you sleep“!?!? [Emphasis added, from under my bed.] Yiiiii! Somebody call Buffy!
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ultimate romantic choice? The one you’ve got vs. the one that got away? Familiar and stable vs. fizzy and exciting? Veronica vs. Betty?
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