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March 17

His cross-dressing to bear

Filed under: Advice — posted by Breakup Girl @ 8:07 am

Clothes make the man on June 1, 1998

Dear Breakup Girl,

I’ll keep this brief…or should I say bikini? I have been married for almost nine years and have two wonderful children with my husband. [Two years ago] I found out through a snoopfest that my husband is a transvestite…and has been acting out his behavior for 25 years. It floored me and freaked me out. I had the usual questions such as: did I do this to him? Is he gay? Has he been wearing my stuff? We have remained married thought I have offered separation and divorce twice since learning of his fetish. We have not had sex in two years and it is getting hard to resist the urge to find someone else to have a relationship with. He says he can control it and won’t do it anymore … I doubt him. Our sex life prior to the discovery was infrequent at best…i.e. three to four times a year. He has since explained that this is because his fetish is such a sexual stimulant to for him. I love him for the person he is…but can’t yet accept the fetish and fear I am going to “die on the vine.” How long should I wait to possibly feel something for him again? Should I leave him and give myself credit for trying for the last two years …I am not in love with him or even attracted to him anymore…or is it my problem and I should live with it?

— WonderWear



March 16

Perspiring minds

Filed under: Advice — posted by Breakup Girl @ 8:14 am

Asking for it on June 1, 1998

Dear Breakup Girl,

Two questions.

1. During a discussion with one of my many platonic female friends, I mentioned that I’d seen a cute girl at the gym. Normally, when I see a woman that I want to meet, I strike up a conversation with her. As long as the lights are on, it doesn’ t matter to me whether or not she’s sweaty (within reason, of course). I guess what I’m saying is that I wouldn’t think twice about talking to a girl at the gym. My friend had said she wouldn’t date anyone she met at the gym; that she just goes there to work out and that’s it. What are your thoughts on this?

2. Whenever I read one of those “what do women look for in guys” type polls, “sense of humor” is almost always one of the top three qualities. Why, then, do so few women have a well-developed sense of humor? I’m sure they’re out there, but I’m not meeting them. Very few women can tell a good joke. And the ones that can are usually married. Why is that?

— Rocket from the Couch



March 15

Desirable me

Filed under: Advice — posted by Breakup Girl @ 9:14 am

Insecurity lockdown on June 1, 1998

Dear Breakup Girl,

This guy I’ve been dating for five months is sweet, smart, cute, loaded, calls twice a day minimum, respects what I have to say, etc. He just can’t seem to stop mentioning how many girls have the hots for him. He’ll have a business lunch and then let on that he’s a little upset cause his lunch partner was “working him” (his term). Or, he’ll have weirdness with this girl or that cause she “kinda liked him” and he “wasn’t into it.” He makes it very clear that he’s not interested in anyone but me. I just don’t get why someone so handsome and accomplished should feel the need to point out constantly how desirable every girl on the planet finds him. I have tried to tease him gently about this but it doesn’t seem to sink in, and I don’t want to start a fight.

— Liesel



March 14


Filed under: Advice — posted by Breakup Girl @ 8:41 am

Truer words were never spoken than on June 1, 1998

Dear Breakup Girl,

I have known this girl for a long time and she’s become like an older sister to me (she is a bit older than me) and I have developed feelings for her — not just her looks, but the way she moves, the way she talks, the way she acts, etc. What do I say to her that will make her like me without letting her know that I like her?

— Arson

Dear Arson,

Probably something like “I never want to see you again.”

Breakup Girl


March 11

The Platonic Shoulder Guy Friend

Filed under: Advice — posted by Breakup Girl @ 9:25 am

The Predicament of the Week from June 1, 1998

Dear Breakup Girl,

Females confuse me. Sure, I know it’s a two-way street — we confuse females, and you in turn confuse us. It just seems that lately, you’re all out to win some “let’s confuse Brad” contest. Here’s the deal: I liked this girl named Tina, and I was planning to ask her out. A friend of mine opened his big stupid mouth the day I was planning to do it, and she got a mutual friend to approach me and tell me that dating me would be “awkward,” and that she feels like she’s known me too long to date me.

Well, fine. I’ve been fed that tired old line before, and I suppose I’m getting used to it.

Then Lynore came along.

It was right after Tina began avoiding me. Lynore likes this guy named Stu, and Stu had just broken a big date with her to go out with a girl one tenth as wonderful as Lynore. Lynore was, needless to say, angry and bitter. She needed someone to lean on, and that person was me. (I am always a shoulder in these kinds of situations…but what can I do?) It started out, you know, hug hug hug. Then, for no discernable reason, she started holding my hand. And she wouldn’t let it go. She started slipping her arm around me and snuggling up to me. This went on every night for a few nights. Then, the other night, she invited me to dinner at her house, and she BAKED ME A CAKE.



March 9

BG supercomputer on blink!

Filed under: Uncategorized — posted by Breakup Girl @ 1:49 pm

Back soon. :)


March 7

Revenge Strikes Back

Filed under: Advice — posted by Breakup Girl @ 10:18 am

Our recent series on revenge elicited quite a few insightful and supportive reader comments (see, when you shelve your plans for elaborate retaliation conspiracies, you have so much more time to share). A couple of highlights:

Dear Breakup Girl,

This is not so much a question as a response to your “perfect” revenge. Whenever I get mad at any guy in my life, I get all dolled up, go out with a group of friends, and flirt like hell any chance I get. Just getting all dressed up makes me feel a lot better about myself. It’s sort of like when you have a horrible fever and can’t leave your bed for days. When you finally do get to brush your teeth, shower, and wash your hair, you feel like a new person. The attention I get because I am being open and flirtatious (and dolled up) helps me get over the If-he-doesn’t-want-me-I-must-be-a-toad blues. And then I go home and sleep soundly. Alone. Keep giving us sensible advice that makes us see how silly we can all act.

— Yank in Brussels



March 4

The green, green grass of him

Filed under: Advice — posted by Breakup Girl @ 10:03 am

Eternal questions from May 25, 1998

Dear Breakup Girl,

My “boyfriend.” who is/was 32, whereas I am 44, has essentially broken up with me. I, however, find that subsequently, his attractiveness and desirability are increasing exponentially with his condescending and sarcastic behavior. How sick am I? How can I get well?


Dear Catherine,

How many cliches do you want? The grass is always greener, you want what you can’t have, yadda, yadda, yadda. Or, to give it a more highfalutin psychological spin, it’s all about avoiding cognitive dissonance: the more Gingrichian his disposition, the more firmly and desperately you cling — at least in your imagination/memory — to days gone by, when he actually was attractive and desirable. No matter what, it’s a normal breakup response, not a symptom of illness. The secret to “getting well,” such as it is, is to not act on these seemingly sick feelings. Take a chill and call me — not him! — in the morning.

Breakup Girl


Those crafty browncoats

Filed under: Treats — posted by Breakup Girl @ 7:37 am


My favorite:

H/T DJDistracted.


March 3

Here yesterday

Filed under: Celebrities — posted by Breakup Girl @ 10:27 am

Back tomorrow! No time to blog. This goddess business has made for a lot of complications.

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