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May 4

My prom date is seeing someone else!

Filed under: Advice — posted by Breakup Girl @ 9:02 am

promtagMoving on on June 1, 1998

Dear Breakup Girl,

My boyfriend broke up with me about three months ago for (at the time not much of a reason other than “I love you but I need to do this right now” and “I am bored”). Quite contradictory, I know, but anyway…we have remained close friends throughout this and now we are going to the prom. Then he drops the bomb that he is seeing someone and is that OK? I feel heart-broken again because I didn’t think he was moving on quite yet. I feel like we are extremely compatible and are meant for each other, I truly believe that. It seems that nobody (not even me) understands our relationship. Here is the question: If I am “supposed” to move on and am not, then does that mean that this love that I have fallen into is meant to be? I am not obsessed or anything, I just want to know if there is anything left to do!

— Jolene

Dear Jolene,

Yes. Get in touch with Lisa (below) and find out if you can join her on Ladies’ Night. I mean, first of all, you did use the present tense: are you still supposedly going to prom with him? ‘Cause no, you’re not. Not because you’re punishing him — he’s entitled to “move on,” though it would be considerate of him to do it in Alaska … unless you live in Alaska, in which case, I don’t know, Maine — but just because … it will suck. More important, maddening as it is, it doesn’t Mean Anything that he’s seeing someone and you’re not. Important Breakup Girl Maxim: Seeing Someone New and Having Moved On are unrelated. Apples and … blue. Some people see new people before they’ve emotionally moved on; some people find that truly having moved on means not seeing anyone at the moment. You know? So don’t drive yourself nuts (easy for you to say, BG!) trying to chart your “progress” against his. Short of moving to Alaska/Maine, just do what you need to do to move on.

Breakup Girl


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