This one, at least, was not penned by a supervillain.

Check out Dr. Joyce Brothers’s breakup quiz in the Seattle Post-Intelligencer (which “lay(s) out some of the better strategies for a dignified, gentle withdrawal that leaves open the possibility of friendship at the end of the road”) and see if you’ve learned anything from BG — or experience — like, ever.

Girls and horses: match made in hog heaven. All my early fantasies of happiness and adventure featured my strong and loyal steed. We’d gallop across fields, along beaches, or my horse-friend would appear in the schoolyard at recess (you know, because horses always remember the way back), his coat shining like armor, his communications quiet, subtle — intriguing but ultimately knowable. A wild thing whose trust could be won through love and patience.

Hmm, it’s aaaall making sense now.

Which is why Wired columnist Regina Lynn’s latest inspiration — a horse camp for broken-hearted women — is pure, thoroughbred genius.

“We’d provide horses and Parelli Natural Horsemanship foundational instruction for the women to build relationships with those horses. (PNH is perfect because you learn so much about love, communication, relationship give and take, responsibility — and not just as it pertains to horses. Wimmens dig it),” she writes. All that in a supportive environment where women can “discover, or rediscover, their sexuality, their pleasure, their power.”

Somebody give her some seed money! Because sometimes it takes a heckofa lot more than sad country songs to get over a breakup.

Sticky notes: they’re not just a really bad way to break up with someone.

Check this out.

Brought to you by these guys. (Geek crush!)

Have a great weekend!

Oops.

Here, your weekly installment of Ask Lynn, the advice column penned by BG’s alter ego at MSN.com (powered byMatch.com). This week, we meet Lost, who poses one of the biggies: why is breaking up so hard, even when my relationship is so bad?

The deets: “My boyfriend of five years feels like he has to hide everything and lie to me about who he speaks to. …We have fought constantly about it, and every time we fight we break up….he tries to blame me…. I do not think that he appreciates me. Am I stupid for wanting to stay with him? I think so. Then how do I get out of this?”

You mean, besides fast? Find out what Lynn has to say, and then come back here to comment!

Bravo — speaking of staying friends — is premiering a new dating show that sounds like it could be all about the awkward. Date My Ex: Jo and Slade stars the ex-couple from Real Housewives of the Orange County. Jo De La Rosa has moved from the OC to the L-to-the-A to get busy with her music career, but Slade Smiley has come along as her friendly “business manager.” Jo’s friends will be setting her up each week with a new guy they think’ll be good for her, but here’s where Slade really gets all up her business. Not only will he be grilling and testing the guys each week, he’ll be weighing in on how pure he thinks their intentions are. Oh, and he’ll be living with them. Could Slade possibly be interested in seeing Jo independent and happy, or does the very premise of the show prove he’s not ready to move on? Check out a sneak peek — especially if you missed Monday’s premiere — to see the first of many priceless (sad, shocked, or masochistic?) looks on Slade’s face.

For Breakup Girl and Lone Loner, breaking up was the easy part…

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Since life is so often stranger than fiction (people stealing leaves in India, doctors pulling screws and nails from a metal-eating man, the Clapper), the Bush Theatre in England decided to go to the source when conceiving its newest show, “50 Ways to Leave Your Lover,” which opens its run Saturday at the Latitude Festival.

The theater asked people to share their worst (or “best,” depending) breakup experiences, 50 of which found their way into the 50-minute play, performed by two men and two women. The breakup lines uttered range from the classic “Let’s just be friends” to the soon-to-be classic “I’m dumping you by changing my Facebook status.”

I once was dumped by a guy who apparently decided the only was to get rid of me was to drop out of college and drive from Louisiana to Alaska to work on a fishing boat. I got a postcard letting me know. That one’s perhaps better for an epistolary novel, or Discovery Channel reality show, but hey: tell us what vignette would you have offered for inclusion in this real-life art?

Oh no! You know, I did hear something about him and Ben Affleck.

This week’s Ask Lynn — the advice column penned by Breakup Girl’s alter ego — has been posted at MSN.com (powered by Match.com). Lynn hears from Country Boy who has been dumped for not changing his partying ways, and now wants another chance.

But can a party boy change his spots? And more importantly, can he change a diaper? Turns out Country Girl is pregnant, and the baby is most likely his. AND she’s now dating someone else. Oh, Boy.

Is there any hope for Country Boy? Read the column, then come back here and tell us what you think!