Cintra Wilson explores Tiffany & Co. with sharp ear, tart tongue:

I have always been mystified by Tiffany’s heart-shaped silver dog tags, worn on a choke chain, with the engraved instructions, “Please Return to Tiffany & Co.” This, I have always assumed, is precautionary: If your lady gets lost, someone will put her on a plane back to the jewelry store. In any case, they are hugely popular.

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Anyone above the age of 16 may not have noticed, but prom season is in full swing right now. Perhaps no place in the Land of Breakup is more fertile than prom, where so many relationships reach their denouement. So it shouldn’t be surprising that Rob Spillane has compiled a book of prom memoirs by various and assorted writers entitled The Time of My Life: Writers on the Heartbreak, Hormones, and Debauchery of the Prom. I haven’t read the book (yet!) but I must say that the cover — a random collage of prom-goers from the powder-blue-suited 70s up through the more modern vamp-goth ensembles of the zeros — totally made me do one of those huge did-she-just-walk-into-prom-wearing-THAT? double-takes.

Fortunately, those of you in New York City can hear these stories right from the folks who wrote them tonight at McNally Robinson (50 Prince Street, near Lafayette), at 7 PM. The free reading features writers Cintra Wilson, Walter Kirn and Mike Albo. If it weren’t for the fact that I have to work (darn bills keep demanding to be paid), I’d be there with shoes-dyed-to-match-my-dress on. Instead, I’ll task you all with going, then coming back here and reporting on it. Now go forth and boogie…under the tinfoil stars and giant heart made of balloons, of course.