In the absence of a new Ask Lynn column at Happen Magazine or Yahoo, we might suggest you get your Sex Advice From Men Sitting on Stoops at nerve.com.

I’m attracted to a girl I always see hanging out on a stoop in my neighborhood. How should I approach her?
Just say hello and something like, “I see you in the neighborhood all the time. Do you live here?” Ask questions and listen. Talk less. Be present. Listen for that thing you have in common that you can discuss. This girl might be a really cool person, and she might never live up to your romantic expectations, but take a moment to see.

Getting better on April 20, 1998…

Dear Breakup Girl,

I lived with a guy for 6 years–in December he FINALLY asked me to marry him. In January, I had a biopsy to confirm whether or not I had cancer, and then he got REALLY weird. A week after the biopsy, and three days before the results, he dumped me. (The old “I love, but am no longer IN LOVE with you” speech!) I think that he just couldn’t deal with the fact that I’m sick, but I can’t really reconcile this, as several years ago he had helped me nurse my grandfather, who was dying of cancer. I can’t quite deal with this. I feel like if he couldn’t love and support me through this, how can I expect someone else to?

We have had little contact with each other since the breakup. He called me several times after he found out about my diagnosis, and was totally sweet–even hinted around about us getting back together. But when I came back to town a few days later to see doctors and talk to him, he acted like he never even said we should talk about getting back together, which he had. After that, I refused to speak to him, and we have divided property and settled everything via e-mail only.

The thing is, he’s obviously a jerk, but I still love him. Any advice?

— Heartbroken

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Reading the signs on April 20, 1998…

Dear Breakup Girl,

I’m just wondering: if a girl whom you have known for a year suddenly tells you that:
a) she broke up with her boyfriend
b) you’re born under the same astrological sign (birthdays one day apart) as her ex-boyfriend, and
c) apart from that, however, you’re nothing like him,
What does this mean?

She likes you? Yes, no, maybe.

— Tiger Man

Dear Tiger,

Yes, she likes you. But if you want to be safe, I’d wait until Rebound goes into retrograde.

Love,
Breakup Girl

Watching your mouth on April 20, 1998…

Dear Breakup Girl,

I am almost 17 years old and my heart is breaking. I started seeing a guy about two months ago. We were friends for quite a while and we talked every night on the phone. One night, to my surprise, he asked me out. Of course I said yes. We decided to go out the upcoming weekend.

We ended up in the backseat making out pretty heavily. That was the first time that I had made out that heavily. I was in love. I remember saying”I love you,” and he said ” Katie, we just started going out.” I didn’t think much of it then. All of a sudden he said we had to go. On the way home he said he just wanted to be friends. It hurt so bad. He stopped calling me altogether and he talked about me to his friends. I am so hurt, it’s like he died or something. It’s been a while, but I still miss him so much. I just can’t understand. We shared everything together. These kind of things seem to happen to me a lot. I am not fat or ugly at all, but I just can’t understand what the hell I keep doing wrong. I need someone who I can talk to about these problems. Thank You!

— Katie

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MSN.com, Match.com, HappenMagazine.com: they’re in a healthy and satisfying 3-way relationship. This column, which previously ran at Happen, is being promoted at Match on Yahoo this week, so we are putting it back on our front page for comment.

This week Lynn hears from Sweaty Steve, whose hyperhidrosis (unusual sweat output) has put a crimp in his dating life:

The last time I went on a date with someone, we never made eye contact with each other and hardly talked because I was busy trying to hide my hands and checking my pits every time I went to the bathroom.

Does Steve need to deal with his nervousness, his condition, or both? See what Lynn has to say, then leave your own comments or encouragement below!

About finding a boy on April 20, 1998…

Dear Breakup Girl,

What is the consensus about men dating single moms? I am an educated, attractive, fun to be with, early 20’s woman with a 7-month-old son. I broke up with his father about two months ago, but lost interest in the father about five to six months prior. I would like to meet someone, but am scared no one will want to date me because of my baby. Where would I meet a guy?

— Single Mom

Dear Single,

Yeah, it might be a little tricky. Everyone — male or female — who fantasizes about having all sorts of firsts with their soulmate might think, “No fair, s/he already got to do the kid thing with someone.”

Still, it can be done. I checked with my single mom friend Rachel — who, mind you, is getting remarried shortly! — and she says you definintely want to be discreet (but not cagey) at first. “I asked a guy to come into Toys R Us with me, and I never heard from him again,” she says. But she also pointed out that you do have a built-in screening process: it’s not that a guy for whom a kid is a deal-breaker is bad — but the ones who do stick around are, more than likely, way into you, and not freaked about the dad thing.

But where? By this point, Rachel’s 14-year-old daughter piped up. “Parent-teacher conferences!” Not a bad idea. But I bet you’ll find someone before your son is old enough to give advice.

Love,
Breakup Girl

Strategizing on April 20, 1998…

Dear Breakup Girl,

My ex-boyfriend and I broke up about a couple of months ago. I still like him a lot, but he is in love with my best friend and some other girl. The thing with the two girls he likes is that they are complete phonies around guys (and they wear pretty tight clothes). If it is so wrong to change yourself around guys, then why does he like them? Also, how could I get him to like me (oh, and I already got the “be yourself” advice, so can you add something besides that)?

–Penelope

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The Predicament of the Week from April 20, 1998…

Dear Breakup Girl,

You won’t believe this, but I was your Predicament of the Week about 2 weeks ago. Hopefully, I won’t be again, but I guess I’m well on my way. You may recall that I was the one with the long-distance boyfriend who took off on a holiday to Spain at the last minute, cancelling out on me OVER EMAIL (way tacky), and then apologizing for the “prevarication”. Anyway, even though I tried (I really did) to cut him loose like the necrotic tumerous tissue that he is, I just couldn’t help myself, and lo and behold, fell right back into that nasty spider’s web he calls his bed. I’ve just returned from yet another rendezvous at yet another European capital (and believe me I’m tired of all this jet-lag), where we spent an idyllic three days “catching up.”

Here’s the problem. I’m still married, although my husband and I have agreed to separate, especially since he found out about the entire affair and is really upset and broken-hearted since “HE” was his friend for over 10 years. Sh*t happens I know, and I feel really, really bad about it. I feel even worse that it was over The Prevaricator, since I know it was totally wrong and God’s going to punish me for doing such an awful thing to my husband. What’s done can’t be undone at this stage, and that’s another letter anyway.

Here’s my dilemma. Mr. Prevaricator insists that I’m his “best friend,” which I don’t doubt, since that’s how this whole thing started anyway. The problem is that he thinks that he and I can maintain a “casual” sexual relationship. He also says that he doesn’t want me to see other men, but that I shouldn’t think of him as a long term relationship, even though he doesn’t want to lose me as his best friend whenever it’s over (I guess he means the sex bit). He doesn’t know when that might be, but just knows it will have to end eventually. I think he’s finally lost it, since it doesn’t make any sense to be someone’s best friend and have a casual sexual affair with them. BG, isn’t that an oxymoron? I mean you can’t unknow somebody, then re-know them a few minutes later as your best friend.

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MSN.com, Match.com, HappenMagazine.com: they’re in a healthy and satisfying 3-way relationship. Meaning that you can find MSN/Match.com’s “Ask Lynn” columns –penned by BG’s alter ego — over at Happen now as well.

This week Lynn hears from Need Lots of Help, who probably only needs a little help. She writes:

I try not to bother him and respect his privacy just as I would anyone. However, he closes his open windows, especially his email, if I go near him when he is online. What does this mean?

Good question. Check out Lynn’s answer, along with the full letter at Happen, then come back here to add your own thoughts!

The engagement is off on April 20, 1998…

Dear Breakup Girl,

I broke up with my fiance, whom I had been with for seven years, via letter last November. (Via letter because doing it face-to-face or by phone would have resulted in one of our world-famous knockdown dragout screaming battles… anyway, that’s not the issue.) After the breakup we sent letters back & forth for several months, each of which was progressively more hostile. He was mad at me and I had this sort of righteous indignation thing going on.

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